The Mask Slips: Understanding Errol Damelin’s Narcissism
As the messages continue to come in through the contact form, a consistent and deeply troubling theme has emerged. Narcissism. Not the everyday, self-important sort, but something far more toxic, calculated and damaging. Many of the submissions we’ve received, including several we haven’t published for legal or personal reasons, describe almost identical behaviour. Controlling. Manipulative. Emotionally cold. Entirely self-serving.
We’ve now spoken in person to two individuals, both of whom have asked to remain anonymous. Their experiences, separated by years and geography, were chillingly similar. Damelin operates with a ruthless focus. Those around him are either a tool to be used or an obstacle to be removed.
It’s become clear that Damelin doesn’t just show signs of narcissism. He fits what many psychologists would describe as malignant narcissism. That’s the kind of behaviour that mixes charm and confidence with entitlement, grandiosity, control and a complete lack of empathy. People who worked for him, did business with him or knew him socially all describe the same pattern. It starts with charm and intensity. It ends with destruction.
Spotting a Narcissist
Narcissists can be hard to identify at first. They often seem confident, engaging, even generous when it suits them. But under the surface, there are some familiar signs.
• They need constant admiration. Praise, attention, loyalty. It’s never enough. If you stop feeding their ego, they will often turn cold or angry.
• Everything revolves around them. Your needs, your time, your views all come second.
• They rewrite history. They’ll deny they said things, take credit for your ideas or change the version of events to protect themselves.
• They must stay in control. Whether it’s your job, your time, your choices or your relationships, they need to have a say.
• They don’t feel empathy in the way most people do. They can fake it when needed, but they don’t understand or care how others actually feel.
• They seek revenge. If you cross them, even by accident, they will find a way to make you pay. Quietly or openly, but always with intention.
In Business and In Life
In business, narcissists like Errol Damelin leave damage in their wake. They undermine people, lie about finances, turn colleagues against each other and take credit where none is due. They build empires on fear, not trust. The talented people around them either burn out or get pushed out.
In personal relationships, it can be even more damaging. They start strong. Intense attention, big promises, grand gestures. Then slowly it changes. Control, manipulation, gaslighting. Friends and family might not see it, but behind the scenes the impact can be deep and long lasting.
What You Can Do
If any of this feels familiar, trust your instincts. Narcissists can be convincing. They often make you doubt your own version of events. Watch how they treat others, not just you. And if something feels off, it probably is.
If you are working with someone like this, or in a relationship with them, keep records. Set clear boundaries. Don’t rely on their word alone. And try not to take their behaviour personally they act this way with everyone.
If you’ve been affected by emotional abuse, controlling behaviour or psychological harm in a personal or professional setting, support is available. You are not alone.
You can contact Mental Health Europe at www.mhe-sme.org for guidance on mental health resources across different countries.
If you’re experiencing emotional abuse or coercive control, Victim Support Europe offers access to national victim support services in over 30 countries visit www.victimsupport.eu.
If you want to share your own story or experiences with Damelin, we want to hear from you. Together we can build a clearer picture and help others protect themselves before it’s too late.
you can email us at [email protected], or by filling in the Contact Form on the homepage.